Phone Free Since 1945

Responsible Technology Policy for Middle School Boys

By CHRIS DAY, Head of School

Posted May 16, 2025

Now in my ninth year as the head of school, there is one story that I have told often. 

I call it “6-2-1.” On a fall evening after dinner during our first year at Cardigan, my wife Cynthia and I were sitting on the front porch, enjoying the cooling temperatures and watching the campus transition from family-style dinner to study hall. The boys were pulling off their neckties and tossing their blazers on the ground so that they could play for the better part of an hour in the dimming light of the gloaming before study hall. We noticed six boys emerge from French Hall and watched as, in short order, they began playing a game between two trees with one ball (lacrosse or tennis—I forget now which). We sat and watched while the participants created and negotiated the rules—something about advancing the ball in the space between the trees, spread about 30 yards apart.

To this day I have no idea what the rules were, or how the points were earned, but I do know that by the end of that magic hour some boys were on the winning team, some had lost, and most had permanent grass stains on their new khaki pants. Maybe a button needed to be sewn back onto a dress shirt as well. But what I saw that evening confirmed for me what I was beginning to understand as the new head of school: Cardigan was, and is, an ideal place for boys to grow up and experience valuable lessons on the power of imagination, creativity, competition, negotiation, conflict resolution, the thrill of victory, and the agony of defeat. What we didn’t see that evening were kids staring at their phones and falling into social media rabbit holes that damage so many people in our world today.

I tell this story often because it illustrates what makes Cardigan such a special place. On the surface, watching boys playing outside with each other probably doesn’t seem like a big deal. For alumni and parents reading this, you likely remember similar outings when you were kids. Today, however, all over the world, this is a rare sight in the lives of our overscheduled and technology-saddled kids. More than pleasant bits of nostalgia, the activities like the one I just described are crucial to all children’s development. They aren’t playdates organized by adults; rather, they are organic, child-initiated games that emerge and evolve because we set aside time for children to play, wonder, and wander without any technological distractions. And, if you look deeper, you see the creativity unfold as they invent rules and strategies while navigating conflicts and building leadership skills. This kind of character building and creative learning is, I think, one of Cardigan’s greatest strengths and is not replicated anywhere.

There’s no doubt that intentional programming is crucial to building community, but free time—without the distractions of social media, video gaming, and livestreaming—encourages real connections and genuine friendships.

Chris Day P’12,’13
Head of School

A big part of our program rests in not allowing students to have cell phones on campus, something to which Cardigan has been proudly adhering since 1945! In most public spaces in modern culture, kids, and adults too, pass time scrolling through their phones when they have free time—and sometimes even when they are not free. Free time and its aftermath look different here. Sometimes it includes a nap, sometimes it means going fishing with a beloved faculty member, and sometimes it entails just lying in the grass and watching the clouds. Free time created “6-2-1.” It’s also the space in which our community grows. There’s no doubt that intentional programming is crucial to building community, but free time—without the distractions of social media, video gaming, and livestreaming—encourages real connections and genuine friendships.

We put a lot of effort into building a “heads up” community at Cardigan. You won’t find our students walking to the dining hall with their heads down, staring at their phones. What you will see are students greeting each other with fist bumps, a simple nod or smile, and sometimes a playful shoulder shove. We teach our boys to say hello—and make eye contact!—as a simple way to make each other feel seen and a part of this place.

What you will see are students greeting each other with fist bumps, a simple nod or smile, and sometimes a playful shoulder shove. We teach our boys to say hello—and make eye contact!—as a simple way to make each other feel seen and a part of this place.

Being part of this community is not easy; the expectations are high and we are all held accountable. Growth at Cardigan is sometimes measured in grades and sometimes by the growing gap between the bottom of a boy’s pant leg and his shoe…and sometimes by the sense of quiet communion earned by holding a door for others to pass through. But one thing is for sure, at Cardigan growth happens in real time, interacting with real people.